The power of naps and the misogyny of women

[matilda36]

I just had that most precious thing that is a Very Good Nap, was in a good mood since I cleaned the house and was getting ready to have a cinnamon latte and to study a bit, when my phone rang and suddenly I had accepted to take on not one but one and an half extra shifts. I know I am going to pay for it, that I am going to get very, very tired and scared and emotional.... No good for my health. I don't seem to be able to say no. I don't even think it's the extra money (handy to set aside for things like a new laptop, food and internet bills), I think it's that I am afraid of saying no, afraid that they'll be upset at me if I say no. I'll need to talk about it with my therapist tomorrow, after I apologise for being tired and emotional last time..

I was reading skoosiepants "Start where you begin" today, and it made me realise something. That slash can be very misogynistic. In the story (that it's an ok story, quite pleasurable to read), there are three mothers: one (Jeannie) is dead, one (Elizabeth) is an absent mother who promise to be there and then something important does come up, and one (Vala) is simply a bad influence. The men are the ones assuming the role of good parents, in a pretty unrealistic way.

And it's not only that story. Very often women in slash end up ridiculed (see the characterisation of Cameron and Cuddy in most House/Wilson stories) relegated to a secondary role (see the number of fics in which Gwen is Merlin's devoted best friend) or portrayed as evil ( see Lana in a lot of Clex fic or Buffy in most slash fics in the BtVS fandom).

Considering that most slash is written by women I find it an interesting phenomenon. Do we hate ourselves so much that we need to follow mainstream attitudes to women also in out little heaven of porn? Why do we prefer to feminise our male characters instead?

Comments

[joereaves.livejournal.com]

The problem is much slash is written by teenagers and people in their very young twenties who haven't got over the idea that 'true love' means only ever loving one person in your entire life. Therefore the women in the canon are a threat to their OTP. It's the same reason why when breaking up canon pairings no one ever has an amicable divorce. The woman always has to turn into either some kind of psycho or a cheating slut. And why the character they want to slash has to declare loudly that he wasn't *really* in love with ... whoever it is he's previously dated. He thought he was but now he's met his slashy love interest he knows it wasn't real love.

That sets a pattern which other slashers then unconsciously follow as much as we really should know better.

This isn't a swipe at younger authors, there are some who are fantastic, but it's something that is strongly promoted in a lot of young adult fiction, that 'real' love is all encompassing, is more important than anything or anyone else in your life, and can only happen once. The idea that you can love someone and then fall out of love with them or just break up because your lives and ambitions aren't compatible and then move on and fall in love with someone else just isn't something that happens in a lot of fiction. And teenagers often just don't have enough RL experience to see how unrealistic that actually is.

Look at romance novels - while they're less overt about it as they're generally aimed at an older audience who have more experience of RL to compare their fiction to - it's a common trope to have the heroine feel that she can never match up to the hero's previous love interest or worry that he still loves his previous love interest, with no acknowledgement that actually he might always love his late wife or whatever but that doesn't automatically make his feelings for the heroine any less strong or real.

You'll notice the hating on female characters does tend to happen less in the rare cases where the main character is canonically gay.

[eci-frog.livejournal.com]

Sorry for intruding. I just wanted to say that I really think you've got a point there. Good to see somebody else is also noticing and thinking about these things :)

[matilda36.livejournal.com]

Thank you. Not intruding. Comments on my humble ramblings always welcome. Just out of curiosity how did you find me?

[eci-frog.livejournal.com]

I tend to click on the blogs and journals of people who seem to have the same interests as me in search of interesting things. You put out a request for "Sam in charge" fics on sgagenresearch a while ago, I came across it while I was browsing through some old entries. A few clicks later and here I am.

[matilda36.livejournal.com]

Well here youare welcome

[eci-frog.livejournal.com]

It's just me butting in again. I just had to get something of my chest and this seems like the best place for it. Apologies in advance for my mad ramblings.
I've started watching Torchwood (don't know if you've watched it) and have recently begun exploring the fanfiction and I'm appalled by the amount of anti-Gwen (the shows female lead character) fics out there. Personally I kinda like her. I think she's the most human of the lot, good and bad. Quite a complex character, which is a somewhat rare thing in female characters on tv.
She's a little bit messed up when it comes to her relationship with her boyfriend. This is one of the things that I think make her so human and interesting. She cheats on him, tells him, then drugs him so he won't remember and is later shown crying alone over a pizza. It seems as though she gets a lot of critic because of this in the world of fanfic. On the other hand, the guy she was cheating with, Owen, does on one occasion practice something akin to date-rape (on to other people). And yet this character is quite liked in the fandom.
So it seems like it boils down to the fact that Gwen is a treat to the OTP of many fans. To make things worse the treat is canon. Gwen is a romantic interest to the shows lead male Jack throughout the show. Jack and Ianto's relationship, the OTP of many fans, is also canon. At first only physical and then romantic.
I can only imagine how frustrated many of the fans must have been. Finally a show were the OTP (two hot guys getting it on....) were canon, but also with the threat from the female lead being canon! The other female character on the show is quite liked it seems, probably because she doesn't show any romantic interest with either of the OTP. The same with Owen.
I think one can compare it with Sam and Teyla from Stargate. I have not some across any anti-Teyla or Teyla-bashing fic, but plenty anti/bashing-Sam fic. This could be becaus while Sam is shown/hinted at having an romantic interest in Jack of many fans OTP (Jack/Daniel), Teyla does not have a romantic interest in/chemistry with the OTP of many sga fans, John and Rodney.
I actually like the relationships presented in Torchwood. I find I now longer crave that happy ending og that OTP in the show. Perhaps it's a sign that I'm finally growing up...
Okay, I think I'm done now. Again, sorry for rambling :)

[matilda36.livejournal.com]

I enjoed Torchwood at the beginning, then the show lost me, even with an m/m canon male pairing. Gwen is better than they depict her, but they need to slam her down to allow for their perfect OTP. You are spot on on Owen, but I liked Tosh. She's a tough cookie.

(BTW I friended you. Most of my recent entries are friend only, and I appreciate your intelligent comments.)

[eci-frog.livejournal.com]

Intelligent comments? Well, I'm glad somebody thinks so! I must admit I was I just a little bit frustrated when I wrote it so it might not have been as fully though through as it could have been. I've always found that when frustrated, mad or simply a little bit depressed, a good ramble (is that a word?) always helps.



I like Tosh too, but unfortunatley she gets way too little screen-time.

[eci-frog.livejournal.com]

BTW I befriended you back :)

[matilda36.livejournal.com]

Rambles help a lot. I may have a bit of a ramble on the latest episode of House (not sure you are interested in the show)coming up. At a first viewing I loved it, but at a second viewing its portraial of women as shallow wenches that would do anything for a pretty face, pisses me off a bit. I'll have to watch it again and then we'll see.

[eci-frog.livejournal.com]

I haven't watched it, but ramble away. It's good for the soul!