Feeling down
Mar. 5th, 2009 12:10 pmOk. I didn't meet my new therapist on Monday, but for the simple reason I was puking and I had been puking all night. I already have a new appointment.
Migraine apparently. My nerves are still aflame, only ibuprofen keeping the pain down and avoiding the puking.
This gave me an excuse to spend the rest of Monday and most of Tuesday sleeping. Yesterday I went to work and then back into my hiding place. This morning I got up, chatted with Jake and went back to sleep. I slept most of the morning away. I am now up for two reasons: work this afternoon and because I am starting to be ashamed of this depression hidden behind the sleepiness. Because I have now accepted that I am scared and depressed.
You read the news and there are only bad news: economic crisis, crime on the rise...
You go to work and see how business is thinning, how the number of customers is falling and the number of mostly illegal immigrants hanging around is rising, you feel a bit under siege.
You look at your life and you see yourself in a crappy job, with precarious health and a class reunion to go to, where all your classmates are lawyers and teachers. Oh and a wedding.
Sleeping becomes the best idea in the world.
Migraine apparently. My nerves are still aflame, only ibuprofen keeping the pain down and avoiding the puking.
This gave me an excuse to spend the rest of Monday and most of Tuesday sleeping. Yesterday I went to work and then back into my hiding place. This morning I got up, chatted with Jake and went back to sleep. I slept most of the morning away. I am now up for two reasons: work this afternoon and because I am starting to be ashamed of this depression hidden behind the sleepiness. Because I have now accepted that I am scared and depressed.
You read the news and there are only bad news: economic crisis, crime on the rise...
You go to work and see how business is thinning, how the number of customers is falling and the number of mostly illegal immigrants hanging around is rising, you feel a bit under siege.
You look at your life and you see yourself in a crappy job, with precarious health and a class reunion to go to, where all your classmates are lawyers and teachers. Oh and a wedding.
Sleeping becomes the best idea in the world.