Going home

Morning morning...I just booked my flight back to London. I am going home and I am shit scared. Well, I do have two months to sort out my living situation so this means one month in which I can focus on work and myself in my lovely flat. Take it a step at the time. I think I'll go for a flatshare, so I can afford the living but I'll search carefully for the sharer. But luckily I got time for that. As a very wise woman told me once take it a little step at the time and I have done it. I have booked my ticket home. I am going home.I paid my penance.

Always wait until the contract is signed...

Just got an e-mail from my landlord, who is not sure until next week if he can give me an extension. These are the days for chocolate ice cream and crawling in bed. I have postponed my pap test.The simple idea of some man inserting his hand in my most intimate places is giving me the creeps. Not today please. Today I want to make nice dreams on what I will do when i get back home and get started in the quest for the perfect flatmate. I need to visualize myself dealing with these things in a positive way to get positive outcomes.Not to see me winning the lottery, but to feel as if I have won the lottery. Thinking of being the person that the flatmate I want will seek out. Myself, with a big smile, all the love i kept hidden and enjoying the feeling of now, even if it's only the Xanax that does its work. Or writing again that does its magic.