Pissed off
Jun. 4th, 2013 07:39 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
I had worked myself in a good mood with a productive day (Cleaned the car and the kitchen, dyed my hair) when my neighbour did come out and told me that they have forgiven their druggie son.
I know I come from a bad place about these things. The memories of my mother, her lies, her shouting, her embarrassing me are still fresh in me.I may have forgiven my mother, but I haven't forgotten.I retain a disdain and healthy fear of druggies and alcoholics.
So now I am pissed off at them, because they go from throwing him out of the house to believing every lie that he tells them.
*shakes head* I'll just have to keep the music on in my house and be sure to lock the door. Oh and try to avoid showing my contempt when I cross him.
The thing that I am most is scared. I was living in fear when my mother was drinking, and I am scared now. I am in my 40s and still scared like a little girl.
I know I come from a bad place about these things. The memories of my mother, her lies, her shouting, her embarrassing me are still fresh in me.I may have forgiven my mother, but I haven't forgotten.I retain a disdain and healthy fear of druggies and alcoholics.
So now I am pissed off at them, because they go from throwing him out of the house to believing every lie that he tells them.
*shakes head* I'll just have to keep the music on in my house and be sure to lock the door. Oh and try to avoid showing my contempt when I cross him.
The thing that I am most is scared. I was living in fear when my mother was drinking, and I am scared now. I am in my 40s and still scared like a little girl.