Tired and a danger
Aug. 22nd, 2011 08:17 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
matilda36I am on the verge of a breakdown. I just spilled some coffee on the floor and watched it dry in the heat without even thinking of cleaning it up.
I have two giant bags of ricycle to take down to the garbage tip taking place of honor in my living room.
Papers spread all over the place.
A mixture of clean and drity clothes takes over a chair.
In the bathroom, toothpaste designs nice patternes all over the sink and the laundry bin is overflowing.Bedsheets awaits for my dad to pick them over.
Not mentioning the layer of dust covering everything.
My house is a mess and I am not better. I am tired, lazy and occasionally cranky. I am not performing well at work, my symptoms are getting worse and worse, I am being nasty on occasion.
Yet I keep taking overtime. Because of money and pride, because I have to prove that even with my problems I can do it.
While in reality I can't. Because a day a week is not enough for me. Because finishing work at midnight messes up my sleep patterns. Because my doctor keeps adding mnew medications to keep me going.
Two weeks and then I am going on holiday. The question: will I manage them without exploding?
I have two giant bags of ricycle to take down to the garbage tip taking place of honor in my living room.
Papers spread all over the place.
A mixture of clean and drity clothes takes over a chair.
In the bathroom, toothpaste designs nice patternes all over the sink and the laundry bin is overflowing.Bedsheets awaits for my dad to pick them over.
Not mentioning the layer of dust covering everything.
My house is a mess and I am not better. I am tired, lazy and occasionally cranky. I am not performing well at work, my symptoms are getting worse and worse, I am being nasty on occasion.
Yet I keep taking overtime. Because of money and pride, because I have to prove that even with my problems I can do it.
While in reality I can't. Because a day a week is not enough for me. Because finishing work at midnight messes up my sleep patterns. Because my doctor keeps adding mnew medications to keep me going.
Two weeks and then I am going on holiday. The question: will I manage them without exploding?
